Amy Winehouse: Rehab and What You Must Know

Amy Winehouse is trending on Twitter because she is dead. Gutted, horrified, angry, sad, tragic .. the language of loss. A dozen songs or so that will live forever, while all hope for her is gone forever.

Addiction kills. It's ugly and the process of watching someone be at risk is painful. Sometimes, sometimes something stops it.

Sometimes it's just wasted words to say Get Help Now.

If you love someone, don't get into denial about the risks. Learn them, know them, deal with it. Sometimes it's as simple as taking the car keys or saying no to everything. Sometimes you can't stop them no matter what you do.

Get support. Not from your friends but from people who have walked in your shoes. Just do it so that someone you love will never trend on twitter because they're dead.

Al-Anon for you so you can do something good and maybe save some lives .... link.

It Gets Better

I was just thinking that the hot days of summer, the rancor in Washington that doesn't end, the debates about health care and the days of guns and gold that have become ceaseless. Languid summery days that are missed with all the rhetoric and anger, extremism and fear.

As the hot days yearn for cooler nights, there will be resolution du jour and we'll move on. Wishing that middle school, that playground that shows a glimpse of the adult world ahead, included a couple of mandatory courses in civility and that ethic would prevail long after those happy days.

The relentless pounding of please and thank you of our childhood given way to Mean People and Harshness. Imagine living in a country that would flog you for wearing sunglasses or wearing a headdress to school and other unimaginable infringements.

Wearing white and offering white roses is sweet but what really matters?

Allow another driver to slip in front of your car .. they'll gratefully wave thank you and probably do it again.

Look for something attractive about everyone, because we are all just human.

Refuse to participate in those mean, bullying Who Wore It Better or How Could She forums .. it's mean mean mean. Oh and get that piece of spinach out of your teeth.

Don't do a Sarah Palin and think there are real Americans and then the rest, laugh at anyone who attempts divisivness as a blue eyed-brown eyed experiment in real time; admire her capitalism and then switch to ignore.

Give a bottle of water and a sandwich to the homeless person that scares you. Some of them will say thank you.

Smile at someone for no reason.

Say bad words when you stub your toe because medical research, the empirical kind, has determined it will make you feel better.

Presume your friends and family love you ... accept them. Unless they're toxic and hurting you; if so, shun them and heal.

Understand something about addiction and the horrible things it does because it may happen to someone you love; they need help and you need to man up. Support their recovery and their health.

Health care is a right, not an option. That's all.

Boys and men are often physically stronger than you. Know how to defend yourself or get help, and when to scream your head off. I did when that man chased me with a knife.

Demand that your children say please and thank you; know all their passwords, that's a fact of life.

Demand that Facebook take down threatening pages, hate pages and mean pages. Just. Do. It.

Don't live with blank walls and pages. Look at beautiful things and live longer (well, I think so.)

Don't buy counterfeit designer goods if you can help it. It's made by the children of the world and hungry people. That's the truth.

Say hello to everyone you run into. See what happens.

Buy the best quality basics you can (hello sales, I love you). You probably need a black pencil skirt, two fabulous white shirts (one tailored, one fantasy), a black and navy cardigan, pearls, good black pumps, Spanx and a good set of underwear.

Don't give to the people in front of markets that ask you for money to save the homeless or battered women. Do it online because chances are they are all big fat liars.

Accept that someone believes differently, thank them for their thoughts and roll your eyes only when you have walked away.

Make sure all children tell all the bad things bad people do. It is not ok to have children keep secrets.

Vote. Give money to the candidate that you really believe in. Don't give up.

Get angry at mean people. Really angry.

It is not a sin to dress badly and get over mocking anyone. Stop your kids on the spot if they do.

Read. Read everything you can to understand more and more.

Learn about investments so that your 401K doesn't ever become a 101K again. Read.


There's not a lot I can do to change the world except little by little making things a little bit better. I don't know the answers at all but I think that kindness and happiness is contagious. I hope so.

The white roses are early John Galliano.

A Different Way: Armani Prive Fall/Winter 2011/12

Ok, I have to admit that I hate reading about snipes, quotes, from Mr. Armani against other Italian designers. It's entirely declasse and unnecessary. Diego Della Valle snapped back with another take and an invitation to join him in raising money for a restoration of the Colosseum. Mr. Armani declined.  It's just not seemly.

While I was almost rhapsodic about Karl's silhouette and mood at Chanel Haute Couture Fall 2011/12 because it made me lust for tight little jackets and a sort of bohemian but brave attitude, the Armani Prive collection confused me. The clothes are certainly beautiful but something is missing and these seem harsh, a rendition at the highest price levels that simply works hard.

Mr. Armani knows what he's doing and what his customer wants. I don't understand that customer, the woman who allows clothes to walk in the room slightly ahead of her. Beauty of another kind but absolutely beautiful. These dresses likely begin at 20,000.00.

Musing About Haute Couture, Karl Lagerfeld And Fashion

Karl, like Cher, has been around for a while.  A collection tells a story about its moment in time, and like a good novel, there is irony and history, passion and disinterest, love and rebellion. Karl's stories are sometimes abrupt, always intensely honest and frequently hidden by the cacophony of glamor and celebrity. I know that Anna Della Russo jumped in the air, that Milla Jovavich's five year old daughter was front row and that despite or maybe because of the grand scale of it all and the press, the usual irreverence of Karl was missed. That there weren't camellias or pearls and chains, that the somber almost discreet mood was very like the darkness of the late '30's with war and inflation, cabaret and champagne, unemployment and worry. Sturdier than the frail silk, hand beaded frocks in pretty colors. Tight little jackets with a pinched waist and maybe a peplum, to exaggerate a silhouette.

There is a place for fashion and its changes. Runway shows are theatrical experiences and a Chanel show is overwhelming. You can almost smell the money behind this kind of production and nothing really is happenstance. 

I want Karl's little jackets and white shirts, skinny little skirts. I've lived in versions of Rick Owens cardigans, All Saints skinny jeans (that require baby powder to slide them on) and T's or camis. Really love Karl's black dress that's is The Little Black Dress but hardly a dainty thing. Love arm gloves poking out of a 3/4 length sleeve. Haute Couture is not something I lust for and there were so many times that street fashion showed up in a luxurious way at the H.C.  Karl did not create this from the street and in a strange way, this is my favorite of his Chanel collections. It's a very romantic vision hidden under the runway styling. 

It's this kind of feeling that I miss from my buying days. There's a runway show which has to be immediately forgotten or ignored. Even if you were buying for a one designer shop, cannot imagine doing that, you simply don't say thanks send the collection, see you next season. It was all about the showroom, clothes on hangers just like they would be in my shop or in my closet. It could take an entire day, as it did at Dolce & Gabbana with every piece available in almost any fabric. I flew from Paris to Milan just to do Dolce and back late night. I miss touching each fabric, slipping into every jacket (at least) to understand how it felt. It was so private and pure, before worrying about good deliveries, a weak dollar, other stores. It was something that customers wouldn't experience nor should they because they would try on and buy one dress at a time. I was filling my shop with a fantasy from their fantasy. Designers tried to visit the shops that bought their things and wondered how each store could be so different. 

It's harder now, I think. Fashion shows are streamed live on facebook or even in 3D to your iPhone. Millions of people see an entire collection on the designer's website and, grrrrr, can even place orders. It's not the mystique that's gone, it's still in the magic and feel of the clothes. It just is hard for a boutique to compete with a designer. I miss it madly but I think I said that. 

I loved a Chloe collection that Karl designed because some store buyers (department stores, ha!!) and press (not going to say who but "who" sometimes had fights with designers and wouldn't cover them) were absolutely dismayed that he showed it with Frye boots. The next one? White Keds. I love clothes and fashion and style but I am happiest when something is off ... style. Slightly askew, classic and twisted (JP Gaultier totally). Like Karl with his bespoke suit and elegant hair that should be captured on a stamp, his jewels and his sudden grin and his wristlets. I actually have more wristlets and armlets (is that a word) than anything. It just changes things and Karl does. Not in the same pretty way he could. This is for sure not an easy runway collection but the mood and the silhouette are. Purely romantic taken apart and I would be so happy buying this for a pretend shop. The real one at 8.00 sq ft and 400,000. to design is not feasible in a world of designers doing business directly with customers. 

Something Exquisite At The Pushkin Museum

So beautiful .. the work of Ukranian artist Kseniya Simonova and directed by John Cameron Mitchell.